October 7, 2009 | Diane Johnson | Leave a comment Most guys in a conversation are looking for solutions. They want to cut the crap and just want to focus and figure out how to turn the situation around. So when guys are talking to girls there can be a communication problem. In a conversation, girls generally offer their sympathy and want to try and make the other person feel better so they will say, "I'm sorry that happened", "how do you feel", "that sucks" or other similar phrases. When a girl does this the guy doesn't quite know how to respond because this isn't the response he wants to hear. Instead, he wants to hear solutions like "this is what we're going to do", "try this instead", "maybe the other options such as B, C, and D would turn out better". This inability to communicate with one another can also lead to problems in the workplace. If a female employee is telling their boss the problem they're having with a contractor. The boss won't sympathize with the employee, but instead will start offering suggestions. Generally female employees start to get annoyed when this happens, because they're being treated like a kid. Women know what the solution is to their problem because they've already thought about how to fix the problem and evaluated which one will work better. So they don't need solutions they just want to voice their emotions. So instead of the boss just listing off solutions, he should sympathize with her by saying "man this really is a problem and I can only imagine how frustrating that is for you." Then one he has given a little sympathy the girl feels that he understand and he can move on and ask the employee how she thinks she can change or fix the situation. This will not only give her the sympathy she wants, but the boss can also listen to her solutions and then offer his own. This solution is much less likely to make her angry or defensive and only about 5 percent of the male population understand this. Trying to understand one another can be complex. Unfortunately in the work place, communication can be twice as difficult. And when there's bad communication and understanding in the company, everything starts to suffer. So if you can keep the communication lines open, the company will have a much easier time staying afloat. I find it ironic that both sexes think the other sex is confusing. Most girls that you talk to will understand this exactly. For instance, when girls feel bad they go out together and then watch a chick flick, which usually makes them feel better and improves their mood. On the other hand, guys want to just talk and figure out the solutions. The more ideas and time to analyze them the better they feel. Then they feel better about the situation and are ready to conquer. The approaches are quite different when you are in this conversation so remember who you are talking to. Hopefully this has helped you out, I know that it has helped in our office. What can it do for yours?